We can disagree and Still be Friends

We can disagree and still be friend

It is mentioned that ash-Shafi'i - may Allah have mercy on him - debated a scholar over a complex legal issue. They differed and argued for a long time, during which they raised their voices and failed to convince each other. The other scholar's complexion changed and he became angry and felt hurt. When the meeting ended and they decided to leave, al-Shafi'i turned to the scholar, took hold of his hand and said, "Why can't we differ and still be brothers?"

Some scholars of Hadith once sat in the presence of a Caliph. One of the scholars in the gathering narrated a Hadith, and thereupon, another scholar became very surprised and said, "This is not a Hadith! From where did you get it? Are you lying upon the Messenger of Allah Peace be Upon Him ?"

The scholar replied, "To the contrary, this is a well-established Hadith!"

The other scholar said, "No! We have never heard this Hadith nor memorized it!"

In the gathering there was an intelligent vizier. He turned to the scholar and said very gently,"0 Shaykh, have you memorized all of the Hadith of the Prophet Peace Be Upon Him ?"

"No", the scholar replied.

The vizier asked, "So did you memories half of them?"

"Perhaps", the scholar replied.

The vizier replied, "Then consider this Hadith to be from the half you have not memorized!" and that was the end of the problem.

Al-Fudhayl bin 'Ayadh and 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak were two close friends who would never leave each other. They were both modest scholars 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak decided to go for Jihad and join the garrison troops for guard duty at the frontiers, while al-Fudhayl bin 'Ayadh decided to stay in the Haram to pray and worship Allah.

One day, his heart melted and he began to weep Al -Fudhayl was sitting in the Haram and worshipping Allah. He longed for his friend, Ibn al-Mubarak, and recalled their gatherings in which they would remember Allah. Thus, al-Fudhayl wrote to Ibn al-Mubarak asking him to come to the Haram for worship, remembrance of Allah and recitation of the Qur'an.

When Ibn al-Mubarak read al-Fudhayl's letter, he took a piece of paper and wrote to al-Fudhayl:

"0 you who worships in the vicinity of the Two Holy Mosques! If you but see us, you will realize that you are only jesting in worship. He who brings wetness to his cheek with his tears should know. Our necks become wet with our blood, he who tires his horses without purpose, now that our horses are getting tired in battle.

The scent of perfume is yours, while ours is the glimmer of spears and the stench of dust [in battle]. We were narrated about in the speech of our Prophet, An authentic statement that never lies that the dust that erupts by Allah's horses and which fills the nostrils of a man shall never be combined with the smoke of a raging Fire. This, the Book of Allah speaks to us. Is that the martyr is not dead, and this cannot be denied.

He then said, "From Allah's slaves are those whom Allah has blessed with fasting. They fast like no other people. From them are those blessed with recitation of the Qur'an. From them are those blessed with seeking knowledge. From them are those blessed with Jihad, and from them are those blessed with praying at night. What you are engrossed in is not better than what I am engrossed in. Both of us are involved in something good. This is how gently the dispute ended between the two of them, by simply saying, "Both of us are doing good," and as Allah says, "Your Lord creates what He wills and chooses:'

This was the way of the Companions.

A group of disbelievers got together and rallied to fight the Muslims in Madinah. They came with an army the like of which was never witnessed amongst the Arabs, in terms of numbers and weapons.

In response, the Muslims dug up trenches which were" not able to be crossed in order to enter Madinah. Hence, the disbelieving army was kept behind the trenches. In Madinah, there was a tribe called Banu Quraydhah. They were Jews, lying in wait for the believers. They turned to the disbelievers to help them and began to cause mischief and disorder in Madinah, whilst the Muslims were busy guarding the city at the trenches.

The days passed with great difficulty until Allah sent wind and His hidden army against the disbelievers that tore their army apart. They turned back in failure, dragging their belongings back with them in the darkness of the night.

When the Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him woke up the next morning, he departed from the trenches for Madinah. The Muslims put their weapons down and returned home. The Messenger of Alllah Peace Be Upon Him entered his home, put his weapons down and took a bath.

When the time for Dhuhr prayer entered, Jibril came and called the Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him from outside his house. The Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him instantly stood up in fear. Jibril  said to him,

"Have you put down your weapons, 0 Messenger of Allah?"

"Yes", the Prophet replied. Jibril said, "The angels have not yet put down their weapons. I have just come back, having chased them away. We chased them until we reached Hamra al-Asad", meaning, they chased the Quraysh away when they left Madinah for Makkah. The angels were following them and chasing them away from Madinah. Jibreel then said, "Allah has ordered you to head for Banu Quraydhah, for I am heading towards them to shake the earth beneath them:'

The Messenger of Allah Peace Be Upon Him then ordered a man to make an announcement, "Whosoever hears and obeys, let him not pray the 'Asr prayer except in Banu Quraydhah." The men dashed to grab their weapons, they heard and obeyed and went to the dwellings of Banu Quraydhah, but as they were on their way, the time for 'Asr prayer entered upon them. Some of them said, "We will not pray 'Asr except in Banu Quraydhah's dwellings." Others argued, "Rather, we will pray now, for this wasn't what the Prophet meant. He only wanted us to hurry."

They prayed Asr and continued with their journey, while others delayed the prayer until they reached Banu Quraydhah. When this was mentioned to the Prophet Peace Be Upon Him, he did not chastise any of the two groups. The Prophet Peace Be Upon Him then besieged Banu Quraydhah until Allah gave him victory over them. Consider how they used to differ amongst each other as brothers, such that their differences would not lead to discord, argumentation and people turning against each other.

Believe me, if you deal with the people with ease and gentleness, and with an open mind, they will love you and you would thereby enter into their hearts. And before all of this, Allah would love you, for discord is something always negative.

How to Improve and Correct People's Mistakes

Look at the Prophet's approach in this regard. One day he decided to advise 'Abdullah bin 'Umar to pray the night prayers.

He did not call him and say,"0 'Abdullah, pray the night prayer!" Rather, he advised him as if he was making a suggestion saying, "How nice is 'Abdullah! If only he were to pray the night prayers also!" In another narration he said,"0 'Abdullah, do not be like so-and-so. He used to pray at night, but then he left it."

In fact, if you are able to bring his mistake to his attention without him realising, then this is the best approach. A man sneezed in the company of 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak but did not say:'al-Hamdulillah'. So 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak said, "What does a person say when he sneezes?",

He said, "al-Hamdulillah,'

'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak said, "YarhamukAllah" (May Allah have mercy on you).

The Prophet Peace Be Upon Him had a similar approach. When he would conclude his 'Asr prayer, he would visit his wives one-by-one to sit and talk with them. Once he visited Zaynab bint Jahsh and found honey with her. The Prophet Peace Be Upon Him used to love honey and other sweets. He began to drink honey and talk to her, and ended up staying with her for longer than he would stay with anyone else.

Thereupon, 'A'ishah and Hafsah became jealous and planned that whoever of the two the Prophet visits should say, "I find that you smell of Maghafir!" Maghafir is a sweet drink, similar to honey but has an unpleasant smell. The Prophet Peace Be upon Him was always concerned that his body or mouth did not smell bad, as he used to speak with Jibril and the people. When he visited Hafsah she asked him what he had eaten.

He said, '" had some honey to drink when I visited Zaynab."

She said, "I find the smell of Maghafir on you!"

He said, "No. I only had some honey to drink. But I won't drink it, again."

He then went to 'A'ishah and she said the same to him. Days went by and Allah finally revealed the secret to the Prophet Peace Be upon Him, after a few days, the Prophet Peace Be upon Him informed Hafsah of a matter in confidence but she betrayed the confidentiality. He visited her one day whilst she had a guest known as ash-Shifa' bint 'Abdullah. She was a female Companion and a medical student who used to treat patients.

The Prophet Peace Be upon Him wanted to bring her attention to her mistake by approaching the issue indirectly, in order to be gentle with her. What did he do?

He said to ash-Shifa',"Wouldn't you teach her the 'incantation of the ants the way you taught her to write?"

The 'incantation of the ants' is what Arab women used to repeat, and everyone knew that it neither harms nor benefits.

The incantation as known amongst the women was composed of the following:

"The bride celebrates, dyes, applies kohl and does everything else, except that she does not disobey her husband"

The Prophet Peace Be upon Him wanted to indirectly to teach Hafsah a lesson by repeating," ...except that she does not disobey her husband:'

How beautiful is this approach towards correcting others' mistakes that leaves love intact in people's hearts, unshaken by errors and unpolluted by excessive offers of advice!

It is possible to drink honey without destroying the honeycomb. Do not advise a person as if he has disbelieved due to his actions! Rather, have good thoughts about him and assume that he made a mistake unintentionally, or without knowing.

"Even a good word is charity," Hadith.

Defining Taqawa

Defination of Taqawa for Quran and Ahadith of Prophet (PBUH)

Taqwa is an Arabic word which is explained as a shield against wrongdoing and further expounded as to be “conscious of Allah” or to have “fear of Allah” or to be “cautiously aware of Allah”.
This consciousness and fear of Allah is understood as a protection and a shield against wrongdoing. The abstention of evil through this fear, consciousness and establishing a cautious awareness of Allah, ultimately develops one’s love of Him.

The only basis of superiority and excellence that there is, or can be, between man and man is that of moral excellence. As regards birth, all men arc equal, for their Creator is One, their substance of creation is one, and their way of creation is one, and they are descended from the same parents. Moreover, a person’s is born in a particular country, nation, or clan is just accidental. Therefore, there is no rational ground on account of which one person may be regarded as superior to the other. The real thing that makes one person superior to others is that one should be more God-conscious, a greater avoider of evils, and a follower of the way of piety and righteousness. Such a man. Whether he belongs to any race, any nation and any country, is valuable and worthy on account of his personal merit. And the one who is reverse of him in character is in any case an inferior person whether he is black or white, born in the east or the west. These same truths that have been stated in this beef verse of the Qur'an, have been explained in greater detail by the Holy Prophet in his addresses and traditions. In the speech that he made on the conquest of Makkah, after going round the Ka'bah, he said: 'Thank God Who has removed from you the blemish of ignorance and its arrogance. O people, men are divided into classes: the pious and righteous, who arc honorable in the sight of Allah, and the sinful and vicious, who arc contemptible in the sight of Allah, whereas all men are the children of Adam and Adam had been created by Allah from clay." (Baihaqi, Tirmidhi). 

On the occasion of the Farewell Pilgrimage, in the midst of the Tashriq days, he addressed the people, and said: 'O people, be aware: your God is One. No Arab has any superiority over a non-Arab, and no non-Arab any superiority over an Arab, and no white one has any superiority over a black one, and no black one any superiority over a white one, except on the basis of taqva (piety). The most honorable among you in the sight, of Allah is he who is the most pious and righteous of you. Say if I have conveyed the Message to you?" And the great congregation of the people responded, saying: Yes, you have, O Messenger of Allah." Thereupon the Holy Prophet said: "Then Iet the one who is present convey it to those who are absent," ( Baihaqi) In a Hadith he has said: "You are all the children of Adam, and Adam was created from the dust. Let the people give'up boasting of their ancestors, otherwise they will stand more degraded than a mean insect in the sight of Allah." ( Bazzar) In another Hadith the Holy Prophet said: "Allah will not enquire about your lineage on the Day of Resurrection. The most honourable in the sight of Allah is he who is most pious. "(Ibn Jarir) In still another Hadith he said: "Allah does not see your outward appearances and your possessions, but He sees your hearts and your deeds." (Muslim, lbn Majah). These teachings have not remained confined to words only but Islam has practically established a universal brotherhood of the believers on the basis, which does not allow any distinction on account of color, race, language, country and nationality which is free from every concept of high and low, clean and unclean, mean and respectable, which admits all human beings with equal rights, whether they belong to any race and nation, any land or region.
“It is not taqwa that you turn your faces toward East or West, but it is taqwa to believe in Allah and the Last Day, and the Angels, and the Book and the Messengers, to spend of your substance out of love for Him, for your kin, for orphans, for the needy, for the wayfarer, for those who ask, and for the ransom of slaves; to be steadfast in prayer and practice regular charity; to fulfill the contracts you have made; to be firm and patient, in pain and adversity. Those are the truthful and those are the muttaqun.” [Qur’an 2:177]
Taqwa in Ahadith
The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, “The most common thing which leads people to Paradise is taqwa of Allah and good conduct, and the most common thing which leads people to the Hell Fire is the mouth and the private parts.” [Tirmidhi]
Tafseer ibn Kathir mentions that Atiyah As-Sa’di said the Propeht (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said, “The servant will not acquire the status of those with taqwa until he abandons what is harmless out of fear of falling into that which is harmful.” [Ibn Majah, Tirmizi]
"O ye who believe! Have taqwa of Allah and let every soul look to what provision he has sent forth for the tomorrow." [Al-Hashar, 59:18].

Taqwa (piousness) means, to fear, to refrain and to defend oneself from sins on account of fear of Allah. Muttaqi (pious) is a religious person who lives paying attention to taqwa.The first thought about taqwa is to refrain from harams (forbidden things). Refraining from Makrooh acts (abominable acts) comes after that. Makrooh means a disgraceful and abominable act, talk or behavior. Giving them up is also of taqwa. After that, we confront doubtful things. They have a relationship with harams like as makrooh acts. The suitable behavior in the name of taqwa, when confronting a doubtful, undefined matter, is to think its probability of being haram and to give it up. Then, Mubah (permissible) and Halâl (Lawful) acts and behaviors come. Enjoying them sufficiently and avoiding waste is also of taqwa.Allah’s Messenger (Peace and Blessings be Upon Him), in one of his Hadiths says:” Lawful things are defined, so are unlawful things. However, there are some suspicious things between these two. When a shepherd puts his sheep out to pasture near a forest, there is a possibility that sheep could enter into that forest at any time; similarly, the one who does not refrain from doubtful things could go into harams. “